Tightening the Noose
2003-06-07 - 2:11 p.m.


We are arguing about everything now. Even the little things that mean nothing to no-one, but everything to two people on the edge of sanity, walking slowly but willingly to the fork in the road.

This morning it was about whether or not we should do a "trial drive" to the hospital the day before her operation because we're not sure where the new hospital is located. I'm not going to say who wanted what and their reasoning - because it's boring and pointless - but that was all the argument was about, it didn't even lead to anything more significant. I am now sat in the attic writing this, my blood boiling, beacuse of that stupid, pathetic, petty argument that we'll forget about in half an hour when we start arguing about what to have for lunch.

It's a hard life I tell you. She is on her period as well so that could be contributing - I, however, have no reason to complain about anything. I'm not having an operation which, naturally, means that I'm just the courier of chocolate bars, maker of pancakes, dispenser of pethedine pills, fluffer of pillows... a professional bijobual with no feelings whatsover. We both look as if we're sucking on lemons all goddamn day.

But of course there is plenty to be bitter about. For both parties, I admit. I'd leave now, but it's not the right time for either of us. She needs looking after and I want to do that. It won't be for long I'm sure... then we can both arrive at the fork in the road, go our seperate ways in the knowledge that we did everything we could.

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all words �NFH 2003
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